The plan was simple. Laryssa, my wife, was innocently pretending to be my tag-along friend Andrew’s girlfriend. She saw something in him and felt like he was capable of so much more, that he seemed bigger than he was allowing himself to be.
My Wife Pretended to Be My Buddy’s Girlfriend at a Party
She showed up at a party with him, hosted by a student at his old school. Laryssa played the part of his girlfriend well, fictitiously bragging to girls at the party how amazing her boyfriend was in bed. She swooned over him in front of the guys. By the end of the night, everyone was talking about Andrew.
Andrew and Laryssa had such a good time that they went out again. And once again. And again after that. Andrew became friends with a jock named Mike, who didn’t care for me. Mike was friends with Andrew’s older brother, James, so Mike knew something was up. He encouraged Andrew to make an example out of me in front of Laryssa and the other patrons at a get together they were at. Her reaction would determine the affair’s legitimacy. My wife encouraged him to do it, realizing what an opportunity it would be for Andrew. She called me up and invited me over to where they all were, telling me to go along with the charade of her and Andrew’s “relationship” upon my arrival.
I didn’t know what “making an example out of me” consisted of, so I just sort of waited around for it to happen. People weren’t really talking to me, kind of avoiding me really, all the attention was on Andrew and Laryssa, the new “hot” couple. I drank, drank some more, and eventually, not being able to hold my liquor, I passed out on the backyard deck.
“Your Wife’s Upstairs with Andrew”
When I came to, I was on the ground and wet. I heard laughter and snickers as I rose to my feet, and wanting to leave, I asked if anyone had seen Laryssa. Someone told me she was in Mike’s room with Andrew. I made my way inside, but Mike intercepted me, calling me a piss-mop, refusing to let me into his house any further. Intimidated, I walked away on the driveway before bumping into Andrew’s brother, James, having a cigarette. James knew about what Laryssa was doing for Andrew, although I felt like he knew more then he as telling me. He asked if I was okay, and when he saw how clueless I was acting, he decided to fill me in on recent events.
Apparently when I was out cold, Andrew walked over to me, stood above me, unzipped his jeans and took a piss right on my face. The room was buzzing with laughter. I asked if my wife was laughing, James revealed both he and my wife were trying hard not to laugh. Andrew signed his name with his piss all over my chest, to finish me off. James told me that I should stay off Facebook, because everyone took a cell photo of Andrew making out with my wife, standing over my piss-covered body.
When I Came To, I Could Smell Andrew’s Piss All Over Me
I found all this very hard to believe, but realized my shirt was stained yellow. When I got a whiff of myself for the first time since waking up, reality was setting in..Andrew pissed on my face, in front of strangers and friends alike, including my buddy, my bully and my girl.
When I asked where Andrew was, James told me the same thing Mike did – that he was upstairs with my wife. I looked up and saw the only bedroom light on. Even with the music blasting, I could make out whimpers coming from my wife, repeated panting from Andrew, and simultaneous laughter from them both. I had never heard Laryssa laugh the way she was was while with Andrew.
I appreciated that James was trying to be a good friend, but could see that he was still trying not to laugh, particularly when he saw me pitch a tent listening to the sounds of Andrew and my wife in my bully’s bedroom. I walked away, listening to my wife moaning – then screaming – the name of the guy who’s piss I was drenched in.